Knowing45

The sword that kills the man
Is the same sword that saves the man.

The one who loves you is the one who abuses you. You have to understand, the one who gives security to you is the same one who exposes you to your insecurity. The more he exposes your insecurity makes you feel more secure in him. The insecurity in you gives a power to the person to abuse you. We always miss the situation we are in. The company which protects the employee will also threaten the employee in terms of job security. Hence both come from the same source.

whenever you have any problem. Sit quietly and think. The source which gives problems to you was the one which gave security or comfort in the beginning. Here, men always approach women by promising that they will protect her. The one thing they forgot from whom they were going to protect you. If you watch carefully, they tell you that they will protect you from the devil which resides in them. 
The husband who gave birth to marriage will initiate divorce and we all know the same source was the problem. Hence relationships bring security and insecurity. 

Solution,
It is you who bring security to you by staying detached in attachment.
There is no space in a relationship, If you want space in relationship it is dependent on others. The other has to move a bit to give you space for your life. Space is always the consent of the spouse or lover. Just make him understand that there is no relationship in certain behaviour. Hence others know they never own that part of your life.